The Kind Of Man I Desire

I started a new job in June and I am loving where I am working right now! We are a very productive office, but there is a lot of joy and laughter where I am working. The other thing that I am enjoying is meeting a lot of interesting men surrounding work. None of them are eligible, but they are all different and interesting. It just seems like God wants to me pay attention to the type of man I desire. I am learning what I do and do not want.

First let’s start with the man that lives in my building. I think I mentioned him in another blog. Let’s call him Joe. Well I didn’t realize it for a while, but I now see that Joe is really interested in me. I mentioned before that I was not interested, but recently I had to admit to my girlfriends that I am both attracted to him and flattered by his attention. Now, that does not mean I am interested in a relationship, it just means I think he is handsome.

Joe has done a few things that have completely turned me off. I think I mentioned this before, but one day I needed help with my groceries, but he refused to help. I realize he was looking for something in return. He couldn’t just be a gentlemen and help me with my groceries from the taxi to the elevator. Recently, Joe decided to do volunteer work at my job. Coincidence? I don’t think so. As soon as I told him where I was working he ended up volunteering there, the very next week after I told him. Then recently, we hadn’t seen each other for a while (I come in at 1:00 PM and he works in the morning) and the next time I saw him, he complimented me on my new hair style and lipstick and told me how much he had missed me. But even though I am flattered by handsome Joe’s attention, he still is not my cup of tea. One quality I want is a man who is naturally a gentlemen, meaning he doesn’t have to be told and doesn’t have to work at it. That is just who he is. Joe is not that.

So next there is someone else at work who we will call Kevin. He is a hard-working, handsome man who is very friendly, even flirty, but he flirts with a lot of woman. Recently, he introduced me to his “woman” who he explained to me was only his woman from 6:00 PM to 9:00 AM in the morning! Can you imagine a man saying that?? What’s crazy, is she is a beautiful young woman, but he is still not satisfied. So what do I see in Kevin that’s interesting? Well he really is a great conversationalist. I realize that I absolutely love to listen to an interesting man talk!

Now I know Kevin says crazy things on occasion. He told me a tall tale on Friday and I believed every word and then he told me it wasn’t true. lol But I still love having conversations with him. He took the time to explain to me how men think as opposed to women and it was interesting. Very insightful! I love that quality about Kevin. I wouldn’t do well with a man who cannot stimulate me with great conversation. But Kevin is a player or it’s least that is what he exhibits and I want a man who is faithful. I enjoy talking to Kevin, but I doubt he is faithful.

Finally there is Jimmy who was my job counselor. He was the man who was instrumental in me getting into the place where I am working now. I think I also mentioned him previously. He is married and I rarely see him now. Now physically, I am not as attracted to him as the other men. But honestly he is probably most like what I want spiritually. He talks about the Lord with ease and has a relationship with God. But it’s not just all spiritual. But he is most like me. Spiritual is who we are and so it’s easy to talk to someone like this. Both Joe and Kevin go to church, but they are different. But if Jimmy was single, I would definitely be able to settle down with this type of man.

The rest of the guys at the job are very young. Too young to consider, but they are still interesting. They are mostly looking for attention which I won’t give to them because I am old enough to be their mother. One of them wants to be called “Big Sexy” or Mr. XXX and the other one is always saying “it’s hard to stay sexy”. lol It’s really hilarious. But I ignore that because I just won’t go there.

So there it is. I am learning. I can’t wait to meet the man who I can connect with on all levels. Spiritually, a great conversationalist and good to look at. So what do I have to offer? I think I have a lot to offer. I am am intelligent, a great talker, highly organized and a good cook with old school values. I’ve been called “pretty” all of my life. But, sadly, I still feel I have not “arrived” yet. I need a little more time. But when he comes, I plan to be ready!!

Letting Go!

This is a new year. It’s a new day!

There is a grace in letting go.

Don’t hold on to people who don’t hold on to you. Period…case closed!

A New Memo

I remember years ago hearing a preacher say “check your mail because God has sent a new memo”. I can so identify with that statement because I feel as though I have gotten a new memo.

First, let me start by saying I have no problem saying I’m wrong about something, but I am pretty sure the Lord was prompting me to move and trying to see about my willingness about a move, but in the past week all of that has changed. Let’s say I thought that was what God was saying and was going to be both willing and obedient. But things suddenly changed and we can get new memos from God each and every day.

Let me say this. As far as I know, I am not going to be moving. I am not sure if someone is praying against my move, but I am not going. Honestly, when I said I was moving, I really didn’t have anything in mind other than obedience. I didn’t have a person in mind, I just had a vision of what God showed me the morning I woke up and saw Pastor John Gray saying he moved to Atlanta and so did his mate and that is where they connected. But I honestly did not and do not have the who in the vision. I felt I did a very long time ago, but I am wise enough to realize that the person I thought God was speaking to me about has no interest and honestly I have no interest in hanging onto someone who does not want me. That is simply not Gods will. In order for two people to marry, they both need to want to be together and that is just not the case. I’ve accepted that.

So looks like my new memo is saying to stay put. Actually, I am relieved about it. I remember years ago wanting to take a trip to Atlanta and fasting and praying and turning on Pastor Jentzen Franklin and hearing him say “this is the place where your miracle will happen, this is the place where your prophesy will come to pass, and God says you don’t have to run to Atlanta for it to happen”. lol I have held firmly to that word ever since and will continue to do so.

I don’t know if I received a new memo, or went back to the old one, but right now, I want to say, I am staying right here!

Maybe it was just a test. What do you think? Have you had the Lord do the same to you?

Writing Again

It’s been a while since I’ve posted here. For some reason, I felt that my time for this was over. I’m not too sure that I’m not correct. I just wrote a paragraph and it was all deleted, one word at a time, right in front of my eyes! I couldn’t help but wonder if I should be doing this. The last time I attempted to post on here, something similarly odd happened and I thought maybe I shouldn’t. So let’s try this again.

Since I last posted on here I’ve moved. I was doing live-in work for a 75-year-old lady and after trying to leave several times, I finally moved into a cozy little place of my own. The situation I was in was toxic and I knew it was time for a change.

I am living on the 9th floor and the building is made motel style. Everyone’s doors face outside and when I say outside I mean it. There are no walls, just a railing and a drop down. When I first saw the apartment they offered me, I was so overwhelmed I turned it down. You see I have a tremendous fear of heights and I just couldn’t take the unit they offered me. Later I was offered a unit on the same floor, but closer to the elevator, so it means I don’t have to walk that far to get inside my apartment. It’s still a challenge, but I am facing my fears.

When I finally moved, the Lord spoke to me and said “this is a pit stop”. I kind of felt it when the manager told me that I am not locked into a lease. All I have to do is give them a months notice and I can leave with no penalty. And also being up high was also a sign to me because even though I like my place, I could never get completely comfortable because of my fear of heights.

The other day, I received a prophetic word that I am not going to be where I am living very long. Then the same day a friend of mine who I hadn’t talked to for a while says to me ” I just feel like you are not going to be in your new place very long”. All I could do was laugh.

Back in January I picked out a place and had the deposit in and my electric turned on, when a bombshell hit and I was unable to move in (won’t go into details). I was so very disappointed. And now that I have a place, God sends his prophetic announcement that I won’t be here for long. Funny isn’t it? But God’s ways are not like ours, nor his thoughts. We just need to submit to him and roll with the punches. So how do I feel about moving again after I moved. I am fine with it. I am not sure how soon it will be, but where He leads I will follow. If the Lord says where you are is a pit stop, then it’s a pit stop. Follow Him! My journey continues….

John 2:5  (NIV)

⁵ His mother said to the servants, “Do whatever he tells you.”