Jeffrey’s heart was overwhelmed with love! He couldn’t believe it. He had finally found her. She was perfect in every way. Every time they communicated online, she always said just the right thing. Her words of love were like a balm and he was just sure she was the one. There was only one problem. They had never met.
They connected on a message board and there was always a connection. At first he ignored her and actually mistreated her. But later he began to notice her because she always seemed to say the right thing at the right time. Jeffrey became so enamored with this woman that, he spoke to his mentor about the “relationship” and his mentor suggested that they meet. “After all, how will you know if what you have is real or not?” So Jeffrey set a time.
He finally picked up the phone and called her. Up until that time, he has never even heard her voice. Since she lived in another state, they would have to make plans to meet. When he called she was flabbergasted and overwhelmed and almost couldn’t speak. He understood her reaction because he had a little bit of celebrity in his field and so that was not that unusual.
She planned a dinner at her home so that he could meet her three children. When he arrived he was surprised to see a fourth child, who he later learned for the sons girlfriend. kids living there. As much as they communicated, he realized immediately that he still did not know his lover very well. Initially, everything was a bit awkward at first, but once everyone got over the shock of him being there, they all began to feel a little more comfortable.
Her apartment was small and dingy. The furniture was mismatched and old and the smell of food permeated the apartment. She apologized for how the place looked, but he didn’t mind. After dinner, the kids left and they began to talk. Jeffrey felt sad throughout the entire dinner. He knew immediately that what he believed was wrong. He had seen pictures, so it wasn’t her appearance. It’s just the minute he laid eyes on her he knew they didn’t have a future.
The conversation was strained. She didn’t know what to say and neither did he. He guessed she sensed it too because she said ” Jeffrey, thank you so much for coming. This is once in a lifetime and you made my dream to meet you come true”. She spoke as if she knew they would never speak again. And on that note Jeffrey said he had to go.
When he arrived back at his hotel room he sat quietly. He looked and saw the bouquet of white flowers that he had forgotten to take to his online love. They were now wilted. Sadness and gloom had settled over him. It was truly the end of their love relationship. He knew they would never communicate again. As he relived the evening he thought “that wasn’t supposed to happen”. He knew he should never have come.
Sad! But somehow, I can see that happening; a failure to connect in person. It’s funny how so many people are completely different online, even when they’re not trying to be. The type, the lack of faces and voices – it does something to us.
So true. I prefer the “old fashion” way of meeting face to face. :-).
Pingback: Inspiration Monday: the echo before the cry « BeKindRewrite
That was sad, and the emotion at the end came through very well. I had a few suggestions, if you don’t mind, but feel free to ignore them.
”Spoke” in quotation marks made me feel like something is wrong. Maybe chat or texted or something to let us know what exactly is going on right away? For the first 2 paragraphs, I kind of thought it was going to be a ghost story.
And then I think all you need is a little cleaning up of some sentences.
Nicely done.
Thanks Craig. I appreciate your input and will tweak it. I have already corrected some errors and will take another look. 😉
Oh, the reason I put spoke in quotes is because they never really had a verbal conversation. I’ve change a few things. If you have the time let me know what you think.
Sad. Perils of online dating. You just don’t know if it’s a true love connection until you meet
Yep. You don’t. Thanks for commenting!
I thought this was a lovely piece of writing. I think you did an excellent job of conveying the emotion, as well as the want for the emotion.
I do think this could be tightened up a bit. I was a little confused reading about the three (but four living there) kids. They didn’t seem to add anything to the story. And they distracted me from what has actually happening.
I did, however, love that you ended the piece with the MC reflecting over a wilted bouquet. It seemed so very appropriate.
Thanks for your comments. The children being mentioned was simply to let the readers know that she was a single mom. 🙂