Yesterday, I received some good information as a result of my blog post. In yesterday’s post, I mentioned about people receiving a revelation concerning a mate and that is all well and good. If God allows you to see, you can’t deny what God has shown you. But I wound up reading some information about relationships that helped me put everything into proper perspective.
As Christian women sometimes we may get a sense of what God is saying concerning a mate. I know a lot of Christian women go through situations where they believe the Lord said “he is the one” at some time in their walk. Sometimes it manifests and sometimes it doesn’t. But after reading some great information about relationships I realize that feeling that you know can be a disadvantage because you may end up making some costly mistakes and missing out on some old-fashioned wooing.
You see, no matter what you believe you have heard from God, when you get down to it, that man needs to be attracted to you and desire you and want to be with you and vice versa. Now, I know that doesn’t always happen immediately, but it has to after a while. And whatever you do, don’t tell him or her what you believe “God said”. Remember the Bible is clear that the man must find his wife.
If God allows, date someone else for a season. You need to experience someone who is in hot pursuit and just let things play out the old-fashioned way and that is with whomever God allows to come along. I’ve seen it happen more than once, that the people who God puts together often don’t even feel each other. Yes, rarely is it that strong “love connection” immediately. But the love does come. So you may need to just have fun with someone who just likes you and wants you, especially if you are a woman.
So, if you feel you’ve heard from God concerning your mate, should you act as though you have partial amnesia? Maybe so. And the reason I say that is because being too focused will interfere with the natural give and take that you should have in a relationship especially if you are able to interact with that person on some level.
I remember years ago one of my closet friends heard from God concerning her husband (they are still married to this day, more than 20 years) and some interesting things came up after God put them together. One day, when my friend first got engaged, her brother asked her fiance if he loved his sister. You see, they had gotten so much into “the Lord said” that they were not talking about the love, though it was there.”
I also remember this same friend sending some unsolicited pictures to this man and later she asked him was it too forward and he told her yes. She was doing what a lot of single women do. She was trying to move the relationship along, when little did she know, he was talking and planning behind the scenes and her sending pictures was not the right move at that point.
So what do you do with the revelation if you feel you have one? I think you surrender it to God and allow him to bring it to pass in His time and His way. And whatever you do, don’t try to make it happen. I now see clearly that it’s time for me and maybe some others (women) to shift and prepare to be wooed and pursued, even if it’s from someone other than the one you will ultimately be with (yes, I really believe this). It’s healthy and it’s good for the self-esteem.
Song of Solomon 2:16
New King James Version (NKJV)
16a My beloved is mine, and I am his.