Ugh! I’m mad at myself. I have had some issues in the past couple of days and my behavior has been less than stellar. I’ve really been acting our of character. It’s interesting how I am dealing with emotions that have been lying dormant, and now that they are surfacing, I don’t know how to handle it.
Yes, I’m being vague for a reason. Often when we’ve not dealt with certain emotions in the past, we never know how we will react. But then when certain emotions surface, and we don’t know how to handle it, we may see a different side of ourselves that we don’t even recognize.
Here is an example. I’m not a mother, but when my best friend started having children, I quickly learned that there is no bond on earth, like the bond between a mother and her child. If you want to see the sweetest most demure, mild-mannered woman turn into a lioness, just mess with her child. She will become someone that you don’t recognize.
This can be true about anything. I recently had to ask someone to stop sharing my business with everyone. I really dislike that. It may be something different for you, than it is for me, but we all have something that will make us become someone else.
So I saw myself become someone different and I didn’t like what I saw. This is not the first time this has happened. But it’s been over the same issue. But at the root of it is that I care, more than I want to admit, so that is why I get so upset concerning this particular matter.
I beat myself up all day yesterday and then I had to let it go. The truth of the matter is that none of us is perfect. Even in Christ, we may do stupid stuff. We may have areas, where we have not quite matured. Whatever the case, at the end of the day, I had to forgive myself and realize that after all, I’m only human.
2 Corinthians 4:7 New King James Version (NKJV)
7 But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us.
2 Corinthians 4:7 The Message (MSG)
7 If you only look at us, you might well miss the brightness. We carry this precious Message around in the unadorned clay pots of our ordinary lives. That’s to prevent anyone from confusing God’s incomparable power with us. As it is, there’s not much chance of that. You know for yourselves that we’re not much to look at.